Real patient

Don, I have a wonderful example of a real patient to share with you, just to let you know that I don't ONLY deal with theoretical ones! This is an obese woman who has been extremely depressed, isolated, sometimes suicidal. She and her psychiatrist have struggled to get her meds right and she and I have been working on identifying and expressing her feelings. The other day she came in triumphantly to tell me of an experience last week.

She's an RN. She made a small mistake and her supervisor pointed it out. She told me that she immediately began to be furious with herself (attack self) and went into the room where the candy machine resides to get something to eat and to regain her composure. At that point, she made a decision to just sit with it and to sort out her feelings instead of eating. She realized that what she was really feeling was embarrassment and worthlessness. She just sat and felt it for a minute, then went out and apologized for the mistake and asked her supervisor for some ideas about how not to repeat it. She was quite proud of herself and felt that it was a turning point for her. She had never actually identified shame in the moment before.

Perfect example of transforming shame into pride, don't you think?

• The real function of innate affect by Don Nathanson, 5/18/96
  • Affect pattern chart by Margaret, 5/19/96
    • Logically, by Don Nathanson, 5/20/96
      • Absolutely! by Margaret, 5/25/96