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Re: Frustrated Therapist
aather · 5/8/00 at 3:03 pm ET
You raise some interesting issues here. Why is it a bad thing to care about this girl?? I wouldn't say that I think it is a "bad thing". I do care about her, I care about all of my clients. I don't want to see anything happen to any of them. However, this particular client triggers something in me that I have to say does render me less than effective as her therapist. I am aware of it, and I try to stay on top of it, but I find myself wanting to reach out to her and help her instead of teaching her to help herself. I find myself wanting to be able to take away her pain instead of allowing her to face it. I have been able to this point to not let my own personal feelings get in the way. I find that I think about her a lot, wonder how she is, what's she's doing and I've never been one to take my work home with me before. Sure occassionally a client would cross my mind, but it wasn't a situation where I would spend hours trying to figure out what to try next or how to get through to her. What I meant by being too involved was that I want things for her, I want her to see herself as the wonderful person that she is, but I am concerned that I want those things for the wrong reasons. I can understand where you are coming from. I do not know what it is like to be on the other end of a theraputic relationship, but I can imagine that it can be very frightening and confusing. I have had clients tell me that it is an extremely isolating feeling. I do my best to create an atmosphere where my clients feel safe and able to discuss anything. My problem is that I have no been able to accomplish that with this client. I am happy to hear that you have found a caring and patient therapist that you are comfortable with. I certainly hope that my clients feel the same way.
aather
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