Sexual avoidance

• Sexual avoidance by Lia Ades, 2/9/99
  
  

Sexual avoidance is a common problem in the general population. There are many causes for this:
* previous trauma or exploitation
* fear of poor "performance"-- lack of erection, lubrication, orgasm, etc.
* fear of one's own desires--the fear that one is a pervert, one's partner will be offended or judgmental, etc.
* the expectation that sex will be physically painful
* a history of unenjoyable or distasteful experiences
* fear of STDs or pregnancy
* fear of getting too close to someone (such as a borderline personality might have)
The treatment of sexual avoidance depends on its cause. An unrealistic fear of STDs, for example, could be treated by a combination of information and an exploration of the symbolic meaning of sex/disease. Fear of one's own desires could be treated by uncovering the patient's internal fears and judgments about eroticism.
For more information about treatment strategies, I suggest:
* Randolph Charlton, ed., Treating Sexual Disorders
* Sandra Leiblum & Ray Rosen, eds., Principles and Practices of Sex Therapy

• Sexual Anorexia by Eric Griffin-Shelley, Ph.D., 3/13/99