Re:EMDR Treatment

I'm not sure I totally understand exactly what you mean by dissociative disorder. I have read a bit about it since I read your response, but we have not gone over that in therapy. I did tell my psychologist that I blanked out during my rapes ~ I wasn't there ~ I just saw white. Is that what dissociative disorder is? My EMDR therapy wasn't really that painful. Some of the memories were unpleasant and I didn't like to remember, but I wouldn't want that to keep somebody else from going through the therapy because it is so helpful. One really cool thing happened after my first EMDR session. I remembered that after my first rape, I took a really HOT shower to get rid of the filth. Since that first rape, I have always taken very hot showers and baths ~ although I never really thought about why I was doing it. My husband would call me pinky because I was scalding myself until I was pink all over ~ for every shower. I also loved my hot showers ~ but I never realized that I was taking them because I was raped and I was always trying to cleanse myself. After my first EMDR session I noticed that I could not take a hot shower, no matter how much I wanted to ~ it was simply too hot. I have to constantly add colder water ~ which just amazes me. I no longer have to cleanse myself from the filth of someone else. He no longer holds that power over me. That is one thing that amazes me the most about EMDR ~ how it makes your brain work. I was talking to somebody the other day, and she said that she took scalding hot showers ~ so hot that she was pink. That made me think ~ was she raped also? I'm not saying that everybody that takes really hot showers was raped, I was just wondering if I was the only one that had ever realized the reason behind my hot showers. Just thought I'd share that little story.

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Re:EMDR Treatment, by Sandra Paulsen Inobe, PhD, 08/27/01

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