Your question is a good one, and a good example of how we can't do case consultations per se here, because the answer to your request lies in part in the way your brain has stored these related experiences. In EMDR, I like to thing of it as targeting a mass with a laser -- ideally we want the perfect coordinates that will "hit" the dead-center of the mass we are trying to "remove". If we don't have exact coordinates, we have to nibble away as best we can on coordinates that are approximate and may be peripheral or may be core. If we hit dead center, the generalization spreads across the entire mass, and we knock out the whole thing. If we are more peripheral in our targets, its more like the way you eat a sandwich, a bite at a time. Unlike a sandwich, though, once a certain critical mass is achieved, the rest of it just falls like dominoes, in my experience (and to introduce another metaphor). Clients can assist collaboratively with target selection by having an overview as best they can of the ones that are first, worst, and most recent experiences. Another thing is to get a sense of whether the same themes were present early in life with a parent (example, feeling unworthy may be an old familiar feeling). In that case, the early material also needs to be targeted. In summary, collaborating with your therapist about all the above may assist in optimal target selection. A well focused laser can reduce the number of EMDR sessions needed. (PS. Readers, there is no laser. Its a metaphor for EMDR).
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