Re: Paths to Adler - Sophia de Vries

(Sophia's first introduction to Adlerian ideas was through the lectures of Fritz Kuenkel, a popular lecturer in Holland, who talked to teachers and parents about dealing with difficult children. The following excerpt is from "Close Encounters With Alfred Adler." For the complete article, as well as "A Biographical Sketch of Sophia de Vries," visit http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/hstein/.)

Meeting Alfred Adler was an event long to be remembered. I recall our first meeting and the enriching ones that followed which confirmed the first impression. While he extended his hand, his eyes behind somewhat old-fashioned appearing glasses penetrated into one's marrow with probing and kindness at the same time. If the warm handshake had not yet conveyed it, the openness of his face would say, "I like meeting you. No matter who you are, I respect you, let us talk."

What we talked about is beyond recall. Maybe it was some technical detail he had mentioned in his lecture. I left after the discussion with the feeling that Adler had known me all of my life, knew me inside out, and had added a semester to my knowledge. His thinking was fast and he gave of what he knew.

The more we followed his lectures, the more we learned about his technique and his encounters with people who needed help. Much of this could not be put into textbooks: intonation, gesture, body expression, empathy, have to be witnessed. Adler had respect for his patients which created an air of openness and conveyed his willingness to help with a fountain of knowledge. Respect always came first, followed immediately by encouragement, which made the patient feel worthy and hopeful. In presenting examples he often used the language he had used with his patients, the terminology adjusted to the patient's capacity for understanding. Here was a therapist who, in a careful approach, quickly came to the core of the problem and used very simple everyday language from the patient's own vocabulary. A human being in the first place who, seeing a person in distress, offered treatment which was easily absorbed because it was logically presented. Often, in one sentence, he reduced the patient's imaginary mountain to the molehill it really was.

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